


The Corners of Sam's Mind

by alphvjensen



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Caretaker Dean, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-30
Updated: 2017-05-30
Packaged: 2018-11-07 00:12:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,581
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11047248
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alphvjensen/pseuds/alphvjensen
Summary: Sam's out of the cage and he's gotten his soul back. And along with his soul, he's got all the memories of hell and Lucifer riding shotgun.





	The Corners of Sam's Mind

He was supposed to be watching over Sam. Keep  _ him _ away whenever he would decide to pop back up but quite frankly, Sam didn’t blame Dean from dozing off. Dean had been up for days, with barely a blink of sleep, running off of coffee and whiskey and whatever food Bobby had in the house. In fact, Dean was starting to look than he was and he didn’t even have Lucifer walking around in his head.

Sam knew what would happen the moment that Dean slipped away into unconsciousness. In fact, both of them knew which was why Dean tried his damndest to stay awake but eventually Dean slipped away from the world, leaving Sam waiting for the one thing that he was dreading.

He knew it was coming but it still didn’t stop him from flinching when he felt the cold pads of Lucifer’s fingers skimming along his forehead as he tucked the loose strands of hair behind his ear.

“Did cha miss me, Sammy.” Lucifer asked, his voice playfully light as he brushed his lips against the shell of Sam’s ear and Sam tried desperately not to shudder at the sound of his voice but he couldn’t help it.

When Sam didn’t respond, Lucifer moved, positioning himself in front of Sam and when Sam tried to look away, Lucifer trapped Sam’s chin in his hand and forced Sam to look at him, holding Sam there.

“Don’t be like that, Sammy.” Lucifer cooed. “I don’t wanna hurt you. I just wanna have so fun.”

“Go to hell.” Sam spit out, the words shaky as he said them and Lucifer only laughed.

“I’ve been. Don’t you remember. We had so much fun with each other too. I miss that, Sammy. You and me and all of eternity to do whatever I please.” Sam closed his eyes, unable to look at Lucifer any longer. “I know that you miss it too, Sammy. The way that you used to beg for me and you used to beg so pretty.”

Sam squeezed his eyes shut, shaking his head slightly, hoping to block him out of his head but he was still there, his hands still on Sam’s body and Lucifer only chuckled at the childish action.

“I never… I never wanted that.” He was hardly speaking.

“Of course you did, Sammy. You say that you didn’t because it’s too hard for you to admit that you did. But there’s no shame in that. You don’t have to pretend anymore. I can take you back if you just let me.”

“No.” It took him longer to say it than he would have liked. “No. You’re not… you’re not real.” That’s what Dean said. Dean said that Lucifer wasn’t real. He wasn’t here. He was just in his head and he could send him away. Just he had to…

“I am very much real, Sammy. I’m right here.” Lucifer ran his hand down Sam’s face, a faux gesture of sweet affection except Sam knew what those hands could do. The pain that they could inflict. “I know that your brother says that I’m not real but have you ever thought that maybe  _ he’s _ the one that isn’t real?”

Sam shot his eyes open and he was no longer in Bobby’s house, sitting on the ratty couch with the squeaky springs. Dean, he was gone. The chair that he had fallen asleep in, gone. It took seconds, milliseconds for Sam to realize where he was and his blood ran cold in his veins.

“You never left, Sammy.” Lucifer taunting, rising back to his full height, towering over Sam, the dark fire light creating deep shadows on Lucifer’s face and Sam was shaking, trembling.

“You’re… you’re wrong.” Sam needed him to be wrong. These past year, being back with Dean, it couldn’t have all been just an illusion. “Cas, he got me out. He…”

“He’s dead, Sam. You killed him. Remember? When I was in your body and you snapped his fingers…” Lucifer snapped his own and Sam jumped at the sound that seemed to echo around them. “And then just like that, no more Cassy. He couldn’t have saved you.”

He still refused to believe it because it couldn’t have been true. He had seen Cas. He saw Dean. He had lost his soul and then he got it back and he was safe, back up on earth with his brother and Bobby and they still fought evil and… he ran his thumb along the palm of his hand expecting to feel the raised skin from the cut that Dean had stitched up but there was nothing there.

His palm was smooth.

His heart was pounding through his chest and he was sure that Lucifer could hear it, could feel it.

“It was pretty smart, don’t cha think? Make you think that you were free, leave all these little bread crumbs that only solidifies the thought that you had really gotten out and then when you least expect it, I rip the rug from out underneath your feet and you fall right back into my hands.” He sounded proud of himself. So fucking proud.

“You’re… you’re lying.”

“Why would I lie, Sammy? For what reason would I have to lie about this?”

“It’s all a dream. You’re not really and I’m… I’m still in Bobby’s house and…”

“Then wake up, Sam. If this is all just a dream then just wake up. Unless, of course, you know that you can’t because this isn’t a dream.”

“It’s a dream.” Sam kept saying. “It’s a dream.”

“Why are you trying to convince me, Sammy? I’ve got nothing to lose. If I’m nothing more than a figment of your imagination then I just disappear and if I am real, then I’ve still got you.” Lucifer crouched back down in front of Sam, grabbing his face and his fingers were so cold that they burned. “Are you trying to convince yourself that this isn’t a dream?”

“It’s… not.” His voice wavered and Lucifer laughed, releasing Sam’s face before he grabbed Sam by his jacket and yanked Sam to his feet. Sam yelped.

“Cry all you want to. You know that no one can hear you down here.” Lucifer taunted, all the softness that was in his voice completely gone.

He shoved Sam up against the bars of the cage that they were in and pressed a hand to the center of his back, keeping him pinned. Sam could feel his lips grazing along the back of his neck, just under his hair and Sam hadn’t stopped shaking.

“Please, no… don’t do this.” He whined.

Lucifer ran his hand around Sam’s body, pressing into his chest before he started to make his way down Sam’s body to above the waist of Sam’s jeans. Sam wanted to thrash out against Lucifer, move or fight or do something but he was frozen to the spot, only able to shake his head.

“Keep begging, Sammy.” Lucifer taunted as he palmed Sam through his jeans, squeezing hard. “You know how much it turns me on. Beg a little more for me. Beg, Sammy.”

“Don’t… call me that.” Sam spit, trying to sound every bit defiant that he didn’t feel.

“What?  _ Sammy? _ ” He squeezed Sam again and Sam whined, holding onto the cold bars even tighter. He couldn’t call him that. It wasn’t a name that deserved to be said by him and yet… “I can call you whatever I want. You wanna know why?” Lucifer pressed himself harder against Sam’s back, his mouth right over Sam’s ear. Sam kept his eyes shut. “Because you’re my  _ bitch _ .”

Then Lucifer pulled away and it felt like Sam could breathe again but he refused to open his eyes. He wasn’t sure what Lucifer had in store for him and when he went quiet, that meant that nothing good was going to happen.

“Sammy…” He whispered and he felt fingers running along his forehead, brushing his sweaty hair from his face and he expected the touch to burn like it always did when Lucifer touched him but it didn’t. “Come on, Sammy. Wake up, man. I need you to wake it.”

It sounded like Dean and Sam couldn’t stand to see his brother there.

“Sammy, open your eyes. Please.” Another comforting touch to the side of his face and it didn’t burn and despite himself, he leaned into it. “Open your eyes. It’s just a dream.”

He shook his head, squeezing his eyes shut even tighter.

The touch didn’t leave him. He felt fingertips run down the side of his face, his eyelids, petting him almost, calming him and with each passing moment Sam felt his heart starting to slow and despite the fact that his body was screaming at him not to open his eyes because this was all a trick, he opened them and he was back in Bobby’s house and Dean was right there in front of him, holding his face, guilt and worry etched onto his face.

“Dean…” Sam suddenly sobbed and grabbed two fistfulls of Dean’s shirt and buried his face in Dean’s chest.

Dean wrapped one hand around Sam’s back, his other clasped the back of his head as he held Sam close, allowing his brother to take comfort in the solidity that was him.

“You’re okay, little brother.” Dean whispered. “You’re okay. You’re safe. He’s gone. He’s not here.”

But in the corners of Sam’s mind, Lucifer sat there perched, laughing at him.

**Author's Note:**

> thoughts, comments and opinions are always welcomed. thanks for reading!!


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